Empathy and Collaboration: Speech at Shell 's People Development Week : Jakarta, Sept 24th 2014

As what Aldi has said, I am going to talk about Empathy: what is Empathy, how we can improve our ability to empathize and what we can do to use empathy to improve the effectiveness of collaboration.

 

What is Empathy for Me?

The word ‘empathy’ has only been part of language use for just over a century. Empathic capabilities in humans are considered to be a part of our emotional intelligence. When we empathise with another person, we are able to see things from their point of view.

 Empathy is a way to create trust between people, communicate more effectively and respond to each others’ needs better.

But there are many definitions around the world on Empathy and here are just five of them. What ‘s in it for You ? Let us take a minute to consider what it means to you.

Why is Empathy important?

You may think that it is important because it makes us understand other people better. But I think it goes deeper than that. I think that Empathy is important because by knowing other people better, we can strengthen relationships between departments , drive our performance and deliver our commitments to our customers, our shareholders and ourselves. An empathetic workforce is crucial to the sustainability of our business.

We are now going to see a video to try another way to answer that question: why is empathy important? But first .. some additional information. Is there anybody here that does not know about Auschwitz? When people ask you about Auschwitz, it is normally in the sense of the Auschwitz concentration camp. This was a network of German Nazi concentration and extermination camps operated by the Third Reich in parts of Poland annexed by Nazi Germany. So this video is the story about an Auschwitz survivor and her brother and the importance of the words we chose when we engage with our fellow human beings...

I first saw this video a week ago and I was stunned by it. It is a powerful reminder to all of us of how powerful words can impact other people but also ourselves. If you think that the words you chose can be bad if it were the last thing you might ever say, then , simply, do not say it.

 But saying it with words are just one way to exhibit our empathy. There are other ways and here are just three of them: Perspective-taking, Personal distress and empathic concern. They are all important yet they are different from one another. If you are good at understanding other people’s views, you may not always understand other people’s emotions. If you understand other people’s emotions too well, it has good and not so good aspects.

 People asked me how did I exhibit empathy and use it to drive Shell’s performance. I can only lead by example here and I would be sharing an example about Perspective- taking. LSBL story.

 By the time we reach this point I hope I have made it clear how the words we chose dictate the tone of the conversation between you and me; between you and your collagues or even in your personal life between you and your loved ones. There are many examples of a good phrase which can help you if you want to demonstrate how empathetic you are and this are a great selection.

 

So often when a customer voices a complaint, we go right into information gathering. We ask the customer for her name, date code, invoice number, date of purchase, and perhaps a half dozen other questions. The problem with this approach is it sounds like an interview or worse, an interrogation. You can drastically improve the customer experience by taking a few seconds to build rapport by simply expressing genuine empathy.

Before jumping into problem solving and before asking any questions, take a moment to acknowledge concern through genuine empathy. When you do, you’ll put the customer at ease, establish rapport and improve the perception of your personal customer experience.

 

As Teddy Roosevelt, a former US President says it: ““No one cares how much you know, until they know how much you care”

 

So, let us put what we learn into practice. For every quote, rank yourselves 1 to 4 on a piece of paper and add up the total score.

 

In the words of Bill Bradley, a fomer US Senator from New Jersey ... “Respect your fellow human being. Treat them fairly, disagree with them honestly. Enjoy their friendship, explore your thoughts about one another candidly. Work together for a common goal and help one another achieve it”

That concludes my session. Thank you for listening and now I hand you over back to the organizing committee. Thank you.